Open up

The following post is an article I wrote, published in the August 2009 issue of The Lutheran.
http://www.thelutheran.org/article/article_buy.cfm?article_id=8341

When you want to reach out to a friend, co-worker, even family member in one of they younger generations, don't say, "join us at worship."

Your invitation probably won't be accepted. I know. It wasn't an invitation to a Sunday morning service but one to serve in a community that brought me back to church. Now, as a pastor in my early 30s, I know, too, that there are many more young people who long for God, not church.

God doesn't live in the four walls of the church - even we who love the church and find there a community which supports us in our faith know that. We know, too, that God sends us out into the world: "Go in peace. Serve the Lord."

So how do you start a new conversation with those folks who tell us they're “spiritual but not religious”? Change the focus from sharing how important Sunday morning worship is to what God is doing—in your own life. Yes, this might will feel awkward at first. Most of us aren't used to talking about our faith lives.

Consider trying some of these seven ways to open up as you reach out:

• Change how you ask everyday questions. Instead of, “How was work today?” also ask, “How was God at work in your life today?” Instead of, “How can I help?” ask, “What can I pray for?”
• Ask your friend or family member to join you in working at the soup kitchen, women’s shelter, or road clean up.
• Share a story about your morning devotions. If the conversation becomes fruitful and the person lives with you or is around often, ask if he or she would do devotions with you occasionally - bouncing around ideas and concepts.
• Share a song you heard at worship or on the radio, or an idea from a sermon that made you think of your friend. This shows you care - and how God works and speaks through other people.
• Pay attention to the spiritual nuances when you watch a movie together. Afterward, ask, “Did you notice ... ?”
• Say grace before every meal, though not necessarily a formal prayer. I often don’t fold my hands and bow my head if I'm with friends who aren't religious. I simply say as I’m pouring the ketchup, “God thanks for the yummy food and good company! Amen!”

Be ready to answer questions about your faith - and to listen to theirs.

In living out these ideas, it's most important to be genuine, to just be you. God’s love is often experienced first through living human relationships. I've had successes and failures. Some people close down because they've been hurt or are making assumptions.

Open up. Refocus your energy and reach out to my generation. The Spirit of God moves in ways we can't understand. But through our actions and prayers, we can stand with these young people - and not just worry as our invitation to "join us at worship" goes unaccepted.